At in8 we often have clients come to us for help with parenting issues. “Parenting” covers a very broad area and includes helping foster parents, adoptive parents and step-parents cope with issues surrounding their new families.
Another side to “parenting” is helping grandparents and we thought we would illustrate this by looking at a recent case that Bindi resolved.
I was talking to a grandparent recently who has a 16 year old grandson who is always wanting to ‘borrow’ money from her and others – this money is never returned.
Rather than the grandparent spending time arguing and feeling pushed into a corner we agreed that telling her grandson to be up front and asking for money to be “given” rather than “lent” would allow for a more honest conversation. The grandparent agreed to broach the subject next time the grandson came to visit.
When they met, she told him she respected that he was old enough to make decisions as to how he spent or saved his money – as indeed she was herself. If he wanted money he could ask for it and she could choose whether to give it or not.
This conversation was carried out calmly and quietly over a cup of hot chocolate and at a time when the young man was not using the vast capacity of his brain by trying to think of 100 different stories as to why he needed the money.
By approaching the topic in this manner the grandson was able to see things from his grandmother’s point of view and she was able to discuss the issue without feeling pressured yet still devise a solution that worked for both of them.
Please contact us if you would like more information about parenting. We are here to help.